Funny: Some jokes

A jealous husband hired a private detective to check on the movements of his wife. The husband wanted more than a written report; he wanted video of his wife's activities.

A week later, the detective returned with a video. They sat down together to watch it. Although the quality was less than professional, the man saw his wife meeting another man! He saw the two of them laughing in the park. He saw them enjoying themselves at an outdoor cafe. He saw them dancing in a dimly lit nightclub. He saw the man and his wife participate in dozens of activities with utter glee.

"I just can't believe this," the distraught husband said.

The detective said, "What's not to believe? It's right up there on the screen!"

The husband replied, "I can't believe that my wife could be so much fun!"

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The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver. He placed it on top of the instrument panel, then asked the navigator, "Do you know what I use this for?"

The navigator replied timidly, "No, what's it for?"

The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators who get me lost!"

The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and placed it on his chart table.

The pilot asked, "What's that for?"

"To be honest sir," the navigator replied, "I'll know we're lost before you will."

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Two college students, George and Sam, are riding on a New York City subway when a beggar approaches them asking for spare change.

George adamantly rejects the man in disgust. Sam, on the other hand, whips out his wallet, pulls out a couples of singles and gladly hands them over to the beggar with a smile. The beggar thanks him kindly and then continues on to the other passengers.

George is outraged by his friend's act of generosity. "What on earth did you do that for?" shouts George. "You know he's only going to use it to buy liquor."

Sam replies, "And we weren't?"