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Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Funny: Some jokes

Father Mulcahey had just checked into the hotel. The bellboy had taken up his suitcase, then showed him how to turn on the television set and operate the thermostat. He indicated the bathroom with a grand sweep of his hand, turned over the key, and delicately kept his hand outstretched.

Father Mulcahey shook it.

Disconcerted, the bellboy coughed and said, "It is customary, Father, to give a small gratuity on an occasion like this."

With a sad smile, Father Mulcahey said, "My son, I'm afraid I have no money, but tell me, are you a drinking man, now?"

The bellboy's eyes glistened. "Yes indeed, Father."

"In that case, my boy, kneel down and, as a gratuity, I will have you take the temperance pledge."


Paul, fresh out of accounting school, went to a interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, "What is three times seven?"

"22," Paul replied. After he left, he double-checked it on his calculator (he *knew* he should have taken it to the interview!) and realized he wouldn't get the job.

About two weeks later, he got a letter that said he was hired for the job! He was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but was still very curious. The next day, he went in and asked why he got the job,even though he got such a simple question wrong. The boss shrugged and said, "Well, you were the closest."


Way down the Mississippi River, two tugboat captains who had been friends for years, would always cry, "Aye!" and blow their whistles whenever they passed each other.

A new crewman asked his boat's mate, "What do they do that for?" The mate looked surprised and replied, "You mean that you've never heard of an aye for an aye and a toot for a toot?"


World's Shortest Fairy Tale:

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?"

The girl said "No."

And the guy lived happily ever after and went golfing a lot.


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