A
man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, "But we don't know anything about each other." He said, "That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go along."
So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort. So one morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 Meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, this followed by a three rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and laid down on the towel.
She said, "That was incredible!" He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."
So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps she climbed back out and laid down on her towel hardly out of breath. He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?" "No," she said, "I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal...
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A man was driving through west Texas one spring evening. The road was deserted and he had not seen a soul for what seemed like hours.
Suddenly his car started to cough and splutter and the engine slowly died away, leaving him sitting on the side of the road in total silence.
He popped the hood and looked to see if there was anything that he could do to get it going again. Unfortunately, he had a limited knowledge of cars, so all he could do was look at the engine, feeling
despondent.
As he stood looking at the gradually fading light of his flashlight, he cursed that he had not put in new batteries, like he had promised himself.
Suddenly, through the inky shadows, came a deep voice, "It's your fuel pump." The man raised up quickly, striking his head on the underside of the hood.
"Who said that?" he demanded.
There were two horses standing in the fenced field alongside the road and the man was amazed when the nearest of the two horses repeated, "It's your fuel pump. Tap it with your flashlight, and try it again."
Confused, the man tapped the fuel pump with his flashlight, turned the key and sure enough, the engine roared to life. He muttered a short thanks to the horse and screeched away.
When he reached the next town, he ran into the local bar. "Gimme a large whiskey, please!" he said.
A rancher sitting at the bar looked at the man's ashen face and asked, "What's wrong, man? You look like you'veseen a ghost!"
"It's unbelievable,
The rancher took a sip of his beer and looked thoughtful. "A horse, you say? Was it by any chance a white horse?"
The man replied to the affirmative. "Yes, it was! Am I crazy?"
"No, you ain't crazy. In fact, you're lucky," said the rancher, "because that black horse don't know about cars!"
So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort. So one morning they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10 Meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, this followed by a three rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and laid down on the towel.
She said, "That was incredible!" He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."
So she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps she climbed back out and laid down on her towel hardly out of breath. He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?" "No," she said, "I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal...
------------------
A man was driving through west Texas one spring evening. The road was deserted and he had not seen a soul for what seemed like hours.
Suddenly his car started to cough and splutter and the engine slowly died away, leaving him sitting on the side of the road in total silence.
He popped the hood and looked to see if there was anything that he could do to get it going again. Unfortunately, he had a limited knowledge of cars, so all he could do was look at the engine, feeling
despondent.
As he stood looking at the gradually fading light of his flashlight, he cursed that he had not put in new batteries, like he had promised himself.
Suddenly, through the inky shadows, came a deep voice, "It's your fuel pump." The man raised up quickly, striking his head on the underside of the hood.
"Who said that?" he demanded.
There were two horses standing in the fenced field alongside the road and the man was amazed when the nearest of the two horses repeated, "It's your fuel pump. Tap it with your flashlight, and try it again."
Confused, the man tapped the fuel pump with his flashlight, turned the key and sure enough, the engine roared to life. He muttered a short thanks to the horse and screeched away.
When he reached the next town, he ran into the local bar. "Gimme a large whiskey, please!" he said.
A rancher sitting at the bar looked at the man's ashen face and asked, "What's wrong, man? You look like you'veseen a ghost!"
"It's unbelievable,
The rancher took a sip of his beer and looked thoughtful. "A horse, you say? Was it by any chance a white horse?"
The man replied to the affirmative. "Yes, it was! Am I crazy?"
"No, you ain't crazy. In fact, you're lucky," said the rancher, "because that black horse don't know about cars!"
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