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Friday, March 4, 2016

Funny: Some jokes

A renowned philosopher was held in high regard by his driver, who listened in awe at every speech while his boss would easily answer questions about morality and ethics.

Then one day the driver approached the philosopher and asked if he was willing to switch roles for the evening's lecture. The philosopher agreed and, for a while, the driver handled himself remarkably well. When it came time for questions from the guests, a woman in the back asked, "Is the epistemological view of the universe still valid in an existentialist world?"

"That is an extremely simple question," he responded. "So simple, in fact, that even my driver could answer that, which is exactly what he will do."


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Management Revisited

- The first myth of management is that it exists.

- Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even what book.

- Give all orders verbally. Never write anything down that might go into a "Pearl Harbor File".

- We are too busy mopping the floor to turn off the faucet.

- Management by objectives is no better than the objectives.
- "I've given you an unlimited budget, and you have already exceeded it!"

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At a girl's college dormitory, dates were permitted only on Saturday night. One young man showed up on a Tuesday evening, explaining to an older woman in the lobby of the dorm that it was imperative he see a certain young lady immediately.

"I want to surprise her. You see, I'm her brother."

"Oh, she'll be surprised all right," said the woman. "But think of 
how surprised I am! I'm her mother!" 

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