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Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Funny: Some jokes

One day a man comes home from work to find total mayhem at home. The kids were outside still in their pajamas playing in the mud and muck. There were empty food boxes and wrappers all around.

As he proceeded into the house, he found an even bigger mess. Dishes on the counter, dog food spilled on the floor, a broken glass under the table, and a small pile of sand by the back door. The family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing, and a lamp had been knocked over.

He headed up the stairs, stepping over toys, to look for his wife. He was becoming worried that she may be ill, or that something had happened to her.

He found her in the bedroom, still in bed with her pajamas on, reading a book.

She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?"

She again smiled and answered, "You know everyday when you come home from work and ask me what I did today?"

"Yes, was his reply."

She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it!"


A young girl was babysitting the family's children for the first time. She started shortly after supper time. The children were playing in front of the house outside. After an hour, she fixed a snack and brought it outside for the children to enjoy.

Then as it got later and near the children's bedtime, she called them all inside and sent the youngsters upstairs to brush their teeth and then to get into bed. Meantime, she settled herself down to watch TV in the living room until the parents would arrive back home. One child, however, kept creeping down the stairs every 10 minutes, but the babysitter kept sending him back up.

At 9 pm, the babysitter was startled by the sound of the doorbell. When she looked outside, she saw a nervous looking woman pacing back and forth at the door. It turned out to be the next-door neighbor Mrs. Brown, asking whether her son, Bobby was there.

The babysitter brusquely replied, "Your son? No! The children here are all in bed already."

Just then a little head appeared over the banister and a voice shouted, "I'm up here! I'm here, Mom, but she won't let me go home!"

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