Funny: Some jokes

A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back the bride immediately called her mother.

"Well," said her mother, "how was the honeymoon?"

"Oh, Mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic... " Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, Mama, as soon as we returned, Sam started using the most horrible language. Things I'd never heard before! I mean, all these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home... PLEASE MAMA!"

"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? WHAT 4-letter words?"

"Please don't make me tell you, Mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed; they're just too awful! COME GET ME, PLEASE !!!

"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset... Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"

Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, Mama... words like: Dust, Wash, Iron, Cook...."

"I'll pick you up in ten minutes!"

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Little Johnny and two of his best friends were bragging about how tough they were.

"Why, I'm so tough," said Bobby, "that I can wear out a pair of shoes in a week."

"Well," said Billy, "I'm so tough, I can wear out a pair of jeans in a day."

"Oh, that's nothing," said Little Johnny. "When my parents take me to see my Grandma and Grampa, I can wear them out in a hour."

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The priest is repairing the church fence. A boy is standing nearby for a long while. The priest asks him: "Do you want to speak with me, my son?"

"No Father, I'm just waiting."

"Waiting for what, Child?"

"Waiting to hear what a priest says when he hits his finger with a hammer."