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Monday, December 15, 2014

Funny: Some jokes

Little Johnny and his father ran a one-mule farm and barely eked out a living.

One day, Little Johnny hit the lottery, winning $50,000. He burned rubber into town, collected his money, and burned more rubber all the way back home, where he told his father the good news and handed him a $50 bill.

The father looked at the money for a moment and then said, "Little Johnny, you know I've always been careful with what little money we had. I didn't spend it on whiskey or women or frivolous things. In fact, I couldn't even afford a license to legally marry your Ma."

"Pa!" Little Johnny exclaimed, "do you know what that makes me?"


"Sure do," said the father, fingering the fifty-dollar bill, "and a cheap one too!"

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The waitress comes over and recognizes the family seated at the table - Mr & Mrs Smith and their little son. Jonathan.

She says, "Jonathan, what would you like?"

He says, "I'll have a grilled cheese sandwich."

She says, "Jonathan, I'm sorry, we don't serve grilled cheese sandwiches."

He says, "You have a grill, don't you?"

She says, "Yes."

He says, "You have cheese, don't you?"

She says, "Yes."

He says, "You have bread, don't you?"

She says, "Yes."

He says, "Well, I'll have a grilled cheese sandwich."

*This kid is three years old!!*

The waitress says, "Jonathan, I'll go see if the chef will fix you a grilled cheese sandwich."

She comes back in a little while and says, "Okay, Jonathan, the chef agreed to fix you a grilled cheese sandwich. I forgot to ask you, though, what you want to drink."

He says, "I'll have a milkshake."

She says, "Jonathan, your parents have probably already told you we don't serve milkshakes."  She was ready for him this time. She says, "Now, it is true we have milk. And it is true we have ice cream. But we don't have the syrup."

He says, "You have a car, don't you?"

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