We took the family to one of those restaurants where the
walls are plastered with movie memorabilia. I went off to see the hostess about
reserving a table.
When I returned, I found my 11-year-old daughter staring
at a poster of Superman standing in a phone booth. She looked puzzled.
"How times have changed; she doesn't know who
Superman is," I whispered to my husband.
"Worse," he replied. "She doesn't know
what a phone booth is."
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My husband was trying to stop smoking and was chewing on
an 'unlit' cigar in an elevator one day.
A lady got on at the next floor, looks at him, and says,
"Sir, there's absolutely no smoking in here. See the sign on the
wall?"
My husband replies nicely, "I'm not smoking,
Ma'am."
"But you have a cigar in your mouth," the lady
says.
"Lady," my husband answers, I've got on Jockey
shorts too, but I'm not riding a horse either!"
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On the first day of school, the kindergarten teacher
said, "If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two
fingers."
A little voice in the back of the room asked, "How
will that help?"
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