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Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Some quick jokes

A man and his wife were returning from a party one evening. As the couple was driving home, she asked her husband, "Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy and irresistible to women you are?"

Totally flattered, he replied, "No, dear they haven't."


At that point she yelled, "Then what the heck gave you THAT idea at the party tonight?"

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A college graduate applied for a job at the Central Intelligence Agency. Together with several other applicants, he was given a sealed envelope and told to take it to the fourth floor.

As soon as the young man was alone, he stepped into an empty hallway and opened the packet.  Inside, a message read: "You're our kind of person. Report to the fifth floor."

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A man was driving home from work late one afternoon when the battery in his car conked out.  Fortunately, he was near the garage where he bought the battery just six months ago.  He called a tow truck.

Inside the garage, he complained to the owner, "My battery died!  When I bought it from you only six months ago, you said it would be the last battery my car would ever need!"

"Sorry," the owner replied, "but I was being truthful.  I didn't think that pile of junk you drive would last six months!"

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