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Saturday, September 6, 2014

Adult joke: Soldiers back from war ..

Three servicemen, Air Force, Marine, and a Sailor, were all on a flight to go home on leave after spending time in Afghanistan. When they landed, a man approached them and said, "Boys, to show my thanks for serving our country I'm gonna give you my truck to drive home so you don't have to pay for a cab."

The guys thankfully agreed and drove off. Halfway there, the truck broke down and they were stuck out on a lonely stretch of road. Off in the distance they saw a farm house and went to ask to use the phone.

When the man at the door answered and saw the men in uniform, he invited them in. He said, "Boys, for serving our country, I'll cook you a steak dinner and you can shack up with my three daughters. You'll have to discuss amongst yourselves who sleeps with which girl. And there's plenty of beer in the fridge."

The men ate and the first girl came down the stairs, a very pretty girl. The fly boy jumped up and said, "She's mine," and they went upstairs.

The second girl came down, prettier than the first. The jar head snatched her up and they, too, went upstairs.

The sailor waited for the last girl, sure that he would be getting the heifer of the group. To his delight, she came down and was the finest of them all.

The next morning, the farmer was cooking breakfast when the fly boy came down, uniform neatly pressed, fresh looking. The farmer asked if he wanted breakfast, but the fly boy said, "No, thank
you, sir. You've done enough already," and left.

The jarhead came down next, uniform not as neat as the fly boy's, but still acceptable. The farmer offered him food, but he only drank coffee, thanked the farmer and left.

The sailor finally came down, still a little drunk, neckerchief messed up and missing a shoe. The farmer offered him breakfast. The sailor ate everything offered and left without even a 'thank you.'

After they all were gone, the farmer called his girls down. Rubbing his hands together greedily, he said, "OK, girls, how did we do?"

The girl who had been with the airman said, "He fondled me a little, drank a beer, fell asleep and gave me $200!"

The girl who had been with the marine said, "He made love to me one time, had a couple beers and gave me $150."

The poor girl who had been with the sailor appeared tired and worn out, saying, "He made love to me all night, drank the rest of the beer, and I'll be damned if he didn't borrow $50 from me till next payday!" 

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