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Sunday, September 21, 2014

Funny: Some jokes

Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy voice I said, "Hello."

The party on the other end of the line paused for a moment before rushing breathlessly into a lengthy speech:

"Mom, this is Susan and I'm sorry I woke you up, but I had to call because I'm going to be a little late getting home. See, Dad's car has a flat but it's not my fault. Honest! I don't know what happened. The tire just went flat while we were inside the theater. Please don't be mad, okay?"

Since I don't have any daughters, I knew the person had dialed my number by mistake.

"I'm sorry dear," I replied, "but you've reached the wrong number. I don't have a daughter named Susan."

"Wow, Mom," the young woman's voice replied, "I didn't think you'd be this mad!"


The wedding day was fast approaching. Everything was ready, and nothing could dampen Jennifer's excitement, not even her parents' nasty divorce.

Her mother, Sheila, finally found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best-dressed mother-of-the-bride EVER!

A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn her new, young stepmother, Barbie, had purchased the same dress.

She asked her to exchange the dress, but Barbie refused saying, "Absolutely not! I'm going to wear this dress; I'll look like a million in it!"

Jennifer told her mother, who graciously replied, "Never mind, dear, I'll get another dress. After all, it's your special day, not hers or mine."

Two weeks later, another dress was finally found.

When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, "What are you going to do with the first dress? You don't have any place to wear it."

Sheila grinned and replied, "Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner."

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