Jokes

1. A guy, a sheep, and a dog were survivors of a terrible shipwreck and they found themselves stranded on a desert island.

After being there awhile, they got into the habit of going to the beach every evening to watch the sun go down. One particular evening, the sky was red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle; a perfect night for romance. As they sat there, the sheep started looking better and better to the man. Soon, he leaned over to the sheep and put his arm around it.

The dog got jealous, growling fiercely until the man took his arm from around the sheep. After that, the three of them continued to enjoy the sunsets together, but there was no more cuddling.

A few weeks passed by, and lo and behold, there was another shipwreck. The only survivor was a beautiful young woman, the most beautiful woman the guy had ever seen. She was in a pretty bad way when they rescued her, and they slowly nursed her back to
health.

When the young maiden was well enough, they introduced her to their evening beach ritual. It was another beautiful evening, red sky, cirrus clouds, a warm and gentle breeze; perfect for a night of romance. Pretty soon, the guy started to get "those feelings" again. He fought them as long as he could, but he finally gave in, cautiously leaned over to the young woman, and whispered in her ear... "Would you mind taking the dog for a walk?"



2. The weather was very hot and this man wanted desperately to take a dive in a
nearby lake. He didn't bring his swimming outfit, but who cared? He was all alone. So he undressed and got into the water.

After some delightful minutes of cool swimming, a pair of old ladies walked onto the shore in his direction. He panicked, got out of the water and grabbed a bucket lying in the sand nearby. He held the bucket in front of his private area and sighed with
relief.

The ladies got nearby and looked at him. He felt awkward and wanted to move. Then one of the ladies said: 'You know, I have a special gift, I can read minds.' Impossible', said the embarrassed man, 'You really know what I think?' 'Yes', the lady replied, 'Right now, I bet you think that the bucket you're holding has a bottom.'



3. The impotent bus driver goes to see his doctor. He wants some Viagra, but he doesn't want his wife to know about it. The doc prescribes it for him, he heads to the pharmacist, who fills the prescription.

Home is a good hour away so the bus driver quickly downs one of the little blue pills. When he gets home, he doesn't even have to tell his wife with words. That twinkle in his eye speaks volumes. They tear off each other's clothes and are quickly in bed.

He manages to "rise to the occasion" three times. *Three times!* He expects his wife to be delighted, but instead, she seems rather sad. "What's wrong, dear?" he asks "I think your job is taking over every aspect of your life and it's doing you in," she sighs.

"What do you mean?" "I mean, even our sex life is like the bus service. Nothing for
ages, and then -- three come all at once!"



4. Justin, 10, had been ill, requiring several doctors' visits and tests before a specialist came up with the final diagnosis and treatment. Afterwards, his mother asked him if he understood what the doctor had explained to him. "No," replied Justin, "not really."

"Okay," his mother replied, "the doctor said you started with a virus..." At which point Justin interrupted to ask, "Does that mean I need a new motherboard?"


5. *Many years ago in a small Indian village,*

A farmer had the misfortune Of owing a large sum of money to a village moneylender.
The Moneylender, who was old and ugly, fancied the farmer's beautiful Daughter. So he proposed a bargain. He said he would forgo the farmer's debt if he could marry his Daughter. Both the farmer and his daughter were horrified by the Proposal.

So the cunning money-lender suggested that they let Providence decide the matter. He told them that he would put a black Pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. Then the girl would Have to pick one pebble from the bag.

1) If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her
father's debt would be forgiven.

2) If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her father's
debt would still be forgiven.

3) *But if she refused to pick a pebble*, her father would be thrown into
Jail.

They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the farmer's field. As They
talked, the moneylender bent over to pick up two pebbles. As he Picked them
up, the sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up two Black pebbles and
put them into the bag.

He then asked the girl to pick A pebble from the bag.

Now, imagine that you were standing in the field. What would you have Done
if you were the girl? If you had to advise her, what would you Have told
her?

Careful analysis would produce three possibilities:

1. *The girl should refuse to take a pebble.*

2. The girl should show that there were two black pebbles in the bag And
expose the money-lender as a cheat.

3. The girl should pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order To
save her father from his debt and imprisonment.

Take a moment to ponder over the story. The above story is used with The
hope that it will make us appreciate the difference between lateral And
logical thinking.

The girl's dilemma cannot be solved with Traditional logical thinking. Think
of the consequences if she chooses

The above logical answers.

What would you recommend to the Girl to do?

*Well, here is what she did ....
*

The girl put her hand into the moneybag and drew out a pebble. Without
Looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble-strewn path Where
it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles.

"Oh, how clumsy of me," she said. "But never mind, if you look into the Bag
for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I Picked."

Since the remaining pebble is black, it must be assumed that she had Picked
the white one. And since the money-lender dared not admit his Dishonesty,
the girl changed what seemed an impossible situation into An extremely
advantageous one.