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Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Humour: THE BEST INSULTS

Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental!

Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?

As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?

I'd like to kick you in the teeth, but why should I improve your looks??

At least there's one thing good about your body. It isn't as ugly as your face!

Brains aren't everything. In fact, in your case they're nothing

Careful now, don't let your brains go to your head!

I like you. People say I've no taste, but I like you.

Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?

If I had a face like yours; I'd sue my parents!

Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent!

Don't get insulted, but is your job devoted to spreading ignorance?

Keep talking; someday you'll say something intelligent!

Don't you love nature, despite what it did to you?

How would you like to feel the way you look?

Hi! I'm a human being! What are you?

I can't talk to you right now; tell me, where will you be in the next 10 years?

I don't want you to turn the other cheek; it's just as ugly.

I don't know who you are, but whatever you are, I'm sure everyone
will agree with me.

I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works.

I could make a monkey out of you, but why should I take all the credit?

I can't seem to remember your name, and please don't help me!

I don't even like the people you're trying to imitate, if you are at all.

I know you were born silly, but why did you have a relapse?

I know you're a self-made man. It's nice of you to take the blame!

I know you're not as stupid as you look. Nobody could be!

I've seen people like you, but I had to pay admission

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