The Rules of Eating Chocolate

§ If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too
slowly.

§ Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all
count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

§ The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a
hot car The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

§ Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off
your appetite and you'll eat less.

§ If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge.
Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to
protect themselves.

§ If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a
balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

§ Money talks. Chocolate sings.

§ Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

§ Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That
way, at least you'll get one thing done.

§ A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories
in one place. Isn't that handy?

§ If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if
you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?