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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Some jokes ..

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double-pane energy efficient kind. But this week I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work had been completed a whole year ago and I had yet to pay for them.

Boy, oh boy, did we go around! I proceeded to tell him just what his fast talking sales guy told me last year. That in one year, the windows would pay for themselves.

There was silence on the other end of the line, so I hung up and haven't heard back.

Guess I won that stupid argument!!!


A little boy went to the store with his grandmother and on the way home, he was looking at the things she had purchased.

He found a package of pantyhose and began to sound out the words "Queen Size."  He then turned to his grandmother and exclaimed, "Look Granny, you wear the same size as our bed!"


"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.

"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him."


One day a group of boys went to the cutest girl in school and declared that a girl could never climb a pole as well as a boy. The girl was furious at their claim and proceeded to climb the pole all the way to the top.

When the girl went home she told her mom about the guys. Her mother told her, "Honey, they just want to look at your underwear."

"I'll get them back for this," the girl thought. The next day the same guys asked her to climb the pole again, claiming that she hadn't climbed it very fast the last time, and that any boy could climb faster.

She climbed that pole again and knew she had showed them since they simply stood there silently this time.

She went home with a big grin on her face and told her mom that they challenged her to climb the  pole again. "What did I tell you! They just want to look at your underwear!" her mom exclaimed.

"I fooled them, Mom! I didn't wear any!"

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