The eligible, handsome and not so eligible men, along with other parameters such as ugliness

1. The nice men are ugly.

2. The handsome men are not nice.

3. The handsome and nice men are gay.

4. The handsome, nice, and heterosexual men are married.

5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.

6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.

7. The handsome men without money are after our money.

8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think we are beautiful enough.

9. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have no money, are cowards.

10. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have money and thank God are straight, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!

11. The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.

NOW...WHO IN THE HELL UNDERSTANDS MEN?!?!